Agace keza ni manda iranga agace k'ahantu ho gutura, aho umuntu yumva afite icyizere, umutekano, neza. Niba bitabaye ibyo, akarere keza gasobanura umutekano wo mumitekerereze kubera kubungabunga injyana isanzwe yubuzima kandi, nkigisubizo, kubona ibisubizo byateganijwe mbere.
Ni ukubera iki ari ngombwa guhora kwagura imipaka yakarere kawe keza, uko byabikora nibizaba niba ukunda umusaza mushya uzwi? Ibi byose bigira kubikoresho bikurikira.
Akarere keza ni iki?
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Umuntu wese afite imipaka imwe yimbere, aho yunvikana neza, irinzwe. Ni ukubera aya makadiri yimbere dukunze gukomera ku bananiwe, ariko nk "" "" "" cyangwa ngo tujye ku batishoboye, ahubwo ni akazi gasanzwe. Aho kugerageza gushaka ikintu cyiza muri kimwe cyangwa ikindi cyiciro cyubuzima.
Agace keza kashyirwaho niyi mipaka imbere. Iki nigice cyumwanya utuzo, aho twumva twizeye byimazeyo. Nk'ubutegetsi, igena ingamba z'imyitwarire mu buzima, ingeso zacu, zituma habaho umutekano no guhanura.
Imiterere aho umuntu arushaho kuba ashoboka.
Urebye, birasa nkaho nta kibazo kiri hano. N'ubundi kandi, ibiteye ubwoba ko umuntu abaho nkuko ari byiza kandi amenyereye?
Ku ruhande rumwe, mubyukuri. Ariko ku rundi, bitewe n'imyitwarire nk'iyi, yikuramo amahirwe yo kubona uburambe bushya, ikura, wige ikintu gishya. Ni ukuvuga, buhoro buhoro (niba wanze kuva mu karere keza igihe kirekire - imyaka cyangwa mirongo itandatu).
N'ubundi kandi, ibyo ari byose ibyagezweho, kwakira ubumenyi bushya, ubuhanga, ubuhanga, kwiteza imbere burigihe bisobanura inzira yo kumwanya usanzwe.
Birashimishije! Nk'itegeko, akiri muto, abantu bafite guhiga kurushaho kwagura akarere k'ihumure kabo, mu myaka yashize kubikora birashobora kuba ikibazo.
Iyo abantu bamaze kwizirika mukarere kabo, nta gikorwa cyo kumukangura - feri yiterambere ryabo ibaho, gutesha agaciro kuza.
Ukurikije icyo, biragaragara ko umuntu wese ushishikajwe n'iterambere ryayo agomba kurenga umwanya usanzwe..
Abahanga bavuga iki
Abantu burigihe bashaka kugira umutekano, ibisobanuro muburyo bwumvikana cyangwa butagira ubwenge. Birumvikana ko burigihe bikomera mugihe ibyabaye mubuzima bijyana ku rubanza rumenyerewe, kandi nta butigeze buti. Utazwi, ku buryo, bitera kumva ufite ubwoba, guhangayika.
Abahanga mu by'imitekerereze bavuga ko umuntu kugira ngo atuze asaba kunyurwa kw'ibanze (physiologiya, umutekano, ibikoresho, kumenyekana, kwigaragaza). Bose basobanura piramide y'amavuta, yakorewe hamwe na psychologue izwi cyane muri Amerika mu kinyejana cya 20.
Ariko, niba umuntu arerereye mubihe byumutekano n'amahoro, iterambere rye bwite rizahagarara. No guhangayikishwa nubukungu buciriritse, bikangura kongera umusaruro. Aya magambo yemejwe n'ubuhanga mu 1908 n'abashakashatsi John Dodson na Robert Yesks.
Abahanga bakoze ubushakashatsi bakoresheje imbeba z'ibindi bibazo, ibisubizo byagaragaye ko biriho urwego rwa "byiza cyane" gutanga umusaruro. Imbeba rero zahawe imirimo yo mu mucyo, zakorewe gusa mugihe cyo kongera urwego rwimihangayiko.
Ariko abashakashatsi kandi bemeje ko iyo imihangayiko runaka imaze kugerwaho - imikorere yimbeba yagabanutse.
Ni ukuvuga, umwanzuro wakozwe ko imihangayiko nto igenzurwa itera ingaruka zikomeza iterambere . Turimo kuvuga ku gukemura imirimo mishya, dukora ibibazo biva mwisi, kwagura urwego rusanzwe rwiza.
Kandi abantu basanzwe bahura nuburyo bwo guhitamo - kuguma kuri verisiyo imenyerewe cyangwa bakagenda cyane, muburyo bushya. Mu rubanza rwa mbere, ibizava mu bihe bizwi mbere, kumva umutekano, kwigirira ikizere, ariko habuze amahirwe yo kwiga ikintu gishya.
Mu rubanza rwa kabiri, burigihe hariho ibyago byo gutsindwa, gutsindwa, ariko nubunararibonye budatsinzwe buzagira akamaro mugutezimbere imiterere.
Nigute wagura akarere kawe keza: Ibyifuzo
Byaragaragaye ko ari ngombwa kuva aho duhumuriza kandi birakenewe niba udashaka kuguma kera kurwego rumwe hanyuma utangire gutesha agaciro. Noneho birabatera ikibazo cyumvikana kubikora?Ako kanya agomba gukora reservation ko umuntu wese afite ibintu bidasanzwe, bityo bimwe mubisaba ntibishobora kuzamuka. Ariko urashobora guhitamo inama zisi yose zitangwa hepfo.
Icyifuzo 1. Reba intego isobanutse
Niwe uzagutera imbaraga kuri wewe, kubishaka gukora imbaraga no gusohoka kumupaka usanzwe. Nk'uko byatangajwe na psychologue, ahanini abantu ntibasiga akarere keza gutya - mubisanzwe ibi bikorwa bifite intego runaka. Urwego rwakamaro rwanyuma rushobora gutandukana, hashyizweho numuntu ubwe.
Ibyo ari byo byose, niba ugiye kwagura urwego rwo guhumurizwa kwacu, birakenewe gusuzuma gahunda y'ibikorwa isobanutse. Ibindi bizashyirwa mu bikorwa ibisobanuro - ibyiza kandi byiza.
Menya ingingo zihariye za gahunda zidahuye numupaka wawe, uhuye niterambere rikomeye. Bagomba kwibanda cyane kubikorwa.
Icyifuzo 2. Shishikariza neza
Niki cyaba mushya kandi utazwi udashaka gukora - kubona uburyo butandukanye, wige gutwara imodoka, wige ururimi rwamahanga nibindi, kuko ibyo byose bisabwa kugira motifike isobanutse.
Reba ikibazo: "Kuki ukeneye ibyo wagezeho?". Urashaka kongera urwego rwumwuga, ugere kumenyekana, ubone amahirwe yo gufasha abantu? Amahitamo arashobora kuba byinshi, ugomba kubona imwe "izamurikira", itanga imbaraga zihagije zo gukora amabere.
Kandi impinduka nyinshi kwisi urimo gutegura, imbaraga zikomeye zizasabwa.
Ni mukemera ubwoba no guhangayika mbere y'ingorane zishoboka zirasenda, ariko icyifuzo cyo kugaragara neza. Kandi ubifashijwemo na moteri ihagije, urashobora kuva mukarere gasanzwe ko uhumuriza, kora umubare ntarengwa wa tereviziyo.
Iyo hatabaho intego runaka, umuntu agomba guhora arwana na we, imbaraga zizaba zidashobora kwihanganira kandi ibyago bikomeye ko mu gihe cya vuba ureka gukora.
Rimwe na rimwe, ariko, hariho ibitemewe n'amategeko - tuvuga abantu biteza imbere badafite intego runaka, ahubwo kwishimira gusa inzira.
Ariko rero kugira umunezero kandi ni moteri. Nibyo, kandi ntibasiga akarere keza, ntugashyireho imbaraga - kuko kuri bo ubumenyi bwabashya bumaze guhinduka ibikorwa bisanzwe.
Ibyifuzo 3. Murangiza
Niba mumyaka mirongo yabayeho kumategeko yihariye, byaba ari ubupfapfa kwizera ko bashobora guhinduka ako kanya imbaraga zoroshye zishaka. Birumvikana ko atari byo, ushobora gusangira gusa guhangayika no gusubira muburyo bwambere, gutakaza imbaraga zose mubikorwa.
Kubwibyo, icyemezo gikwiye cyane - Kora intambwe ku yindi, nta ngabo zikarishye no kubuza bigoye. Bitabaye ibyo, psyche yawe itangira kunanira cyane, kandi urugomo rwawe rwose ntabwo aribwo buryo bwiza.
Kwimuka mu cyerekezo cyintego yawe buhoro, ariko wizeye. Buhoro buhoro kubona ubumenyi bushya, kwagura imipaka isanzwe. Niyo mpamvu abamuhugu benshi bakoresha ijambo "kwagura akarere keza", kandi ntabwo "babirekere."
Kuberako "ikiruhuko" gikabije, utabitekereje kandi, mu buryo butemewe, ntakibazo. Na "Kwagura" bimaze kuba bibi, urukurikirane kandi muri rusange ni ibisubizo byiza. Niba udateshutse mumasomo yateganijwe, birumvikana.
Nigute ushobora gutangira kwagura agace ko guhumurizwa nta gukomeretsa? Tangira uhindura ibikorwa bya buri munsi. Kurugero, urashaka gusubiramo kilo ebyiri zirenze urugero.
Birashoboka kwicara ku ndyo ya strictest, kwirengagiza inzara iminsi mike, hanyuma umenetse, juight hanyuma wongere uburemere bwashize akandi kilo ebyiri. Mugereranije, kubona imyumvire mibi (cyangwa no kwiheba) no guhungabanya imyitwarire y'ibiryo.
Kandi urashobora gukomeza ukundi: Reka tuvuge bike kugabanya igice cya karubone namavuta mumirire, kimwe no kongeramo imyitozo ngororamubiri, nta kazi. Tangira byibuze kugirango uhore ukoreshe ingazi aho kuba lift. Cyangwa kujya kukazi n'amaguru (niba intera, birumvikana).
Dukurikije ibisubizo, urashobora kumva ushyama kugirango uryohe, ariko udahangayitse cyane. Nzumva ko impinduka zishobora gukorwa muburyo bwiza. Nibyo, kandi bivamo bikaba bihamye cyane.
Hanyuma noneho urashobora kujya kurwego rugoye - kurugero, gerageza kugabanya ingano ya sweet ikoreshwa buri munsi kugirango ntarengwa. Buhoro buhoro, wamenyereye imibereho mishya kandi bizakumva neza.
Ndashaka kubona ko umubare munini wa psychologue saba abakiriya babo batigera bareka kwagura agace ko guhumurizwa, guhora biga kandi bagerageza ikintu gishya. Ibi bikorwa kugirango dukomeze guhinduka mumitekerereze, kongera umubare wubushobozi bwayo no kwishimira cyane mubuzima.
Icyifuzo 4. Kanguka ntagarijwe cyane
Na none, nkuko twibuka, ntibagikora ikintu cyiza. Ndetse birashobora guteza akaga. Muri rusange, ibyago neza neza. Ariko ntibisobanura ko ibyo utagomba guhagarika burundu ibikorwa kuntego zawe!Tekereza urwaye guhangayika no kugira isoni zo gukora mu ruhame cyangwa guhura nabantu batamenyereye. Ariko ufite intego yo kubona akazi rusange. Niba ubikora cyane - hazabaho imihangayiko ikomeye.
Tangira kuri nto - ngwino mubatazi mububiko, kumuhanda, ubaze ibibazo, uhugure ubuhanga bwitumanaho. Buhoro buhoro, uziga kumva byinshi kandi wizeye.
Noneho urashobora gutangirana nibitaramo bito imbere yabantu ba hafi cyane. Noneho hamwe na batamenyereye. Kandi buhoro buhoro birafatika kuburyo utagera kurwego mugihe uzahagarika umutima kandi uteye isoni abantu benshi.
Ibyifuzo 5. Ntukizengurutse imyaka
Urubyiruko rworoshye kwaguka urwego rusanzwe - barikubiswe ashya babonaga ububabare buke.
Ibi, byukuri, ariko, ariko ntushobora kwibagirwa ibiranga umuntu ku giti cye. NYUMA YOSE, kurugero, ubwoko bwibikorwa byingorane bigira ingaruka zikomeye kuburyo imipaka yimbere ihindagurika cyangwa ikaze. Kandi ntabwo aribyose bifitanye isano nigihe cya pasiki.
Kandi birashoboka wowe ubwawe uzi amabuye mansimoko ayobora ubuzima bwiza kandi bukungahaye kubantu babo ndetse na bazugokuru bashobora kugirira ishyari! Byongeye kandi, kuko hari urubyiruko rufite amahirwe yo gukemura ibibazo byinshi bikemurwa ku mpinduka nshya muburyo busanzwe.
Muri rusange, ntukeneye kubabazwa niba uri mirongo itatu. " Nibyo, kandi nubwo udatandukanijwe muburyo bwiza bwo mumitekerereze - nanone ntucike intege - tangira gusa na mato, ushikame kandi wishime no guhinduka bito.
Mu gusoza
Birashoboka cyane ko akarere keza ari ahantu hamenyerewe kandi hamenyerewe neza kwigirira icyizere, umutekano n'umutekano. Muri yo twumva neza.
Ariko kwanga kwagura imipaka nziza byanze bikunze biganisha ku kwangirika kumiterere (nikihe siyanse ishimangirwa nibisubizo byubushakashatsi). A nto Guhangayikishwa (bifitanye isano no gutinya gushya, bitamenyerewe, gukenera gukora ibikorwa bishya) bitera imbere imbere kandi byongera umusaruro.