Uburyo bwo Kubabarira Umugabo Wihebuho kandi ukomeze kubaho

Kubungabunga umubano ushyushye mugihe cyubuzima bwumuryango ni umurimo uremereye, wa buri munsi wabashakanye bombi. Kubwamahirwe, ntabwo abantu bose babishoboye, kandi biturutse ku gutongana kenshi cyangwa kutitabwaho, ubuhemu bibaho, kandi akenshi bivuye ku mugabo we.

Nubwo uwo mwashakanye atari yo atigeze agerageza guhisha ibikorwa, bitinde bitebuke umugore, hanyuma bikaba amahitamo atoroshye imbere yacyo - gutandukana cyangwa kugerageza gukomeza gushyingirwa. Muri iki kiganiro, nzakubwira uburyo bwo kubabasha guhemukira kandi ntunyibuke, kandi nzakubwira mubihe bikwiriye gutandukana.

Birashoboka kubabarira guhemukira?

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Niba hari urukundo rukomeye mumuryango, noneho inzitizi zose ziratsindwa. Ntacyo bitwaye impamvu umugabo yahinduye umugore we - umuntu wese arashobora gukora amakosa, ikintu cyingenzi nukumenya no kwihana ubikuye ku mutima. Niba umugore ashaka kubungabunga umubano, agomba kugerageza kubaba uwo mwashakanye, ariko na we agomba kandi gushyira imbaraga kugirango yizere ubwabyo.

Gusa wibagirwe ibyabaye bidashoboka. Nubwo umugore aramutse atanga amasezerano kuri we numugabo we, atazibuka ko ikintu cyose cyabaye, nyuma yiminsi ibiri amarangamutima azaba aruzura, atazashobora gukomeza. Igihe cyose kizarangirana scagel, kandi buhoro buhoro umubano uzabingirika gusa. Ikibazo kigomba kuvugwa, kandi hamwe gushaka uburyo bwo kugikemura, ahubwo ni ukumenyesha uburakari, icyaha nubunararibonye - ibi ntabwo ari inzira.

Ni ngombwa kumva ko ubuhemu butakwiriye kubabarira. Kugira ngo ukore ibi, hagomba kubaho ingingo ziremereye. Bitabaye ibyo, umugabo arashobora kureka kubahiriza uwo bashakanye, agahitamo ko afite uburenganzira bwo gukora ibyo bikorwa, kuko azashyira hamwe amaso.

Nk'uko amategeko, umugore yiteguye kubabarira guhemurwa niba hari umubano mwiza mumuryango kandi hari abana bahuje hamwe. Ku cyemezo cyacyo cyo gufatanya ko gukomeza kuba hamwe bizagira ingaruka ku kwishingikiriza ku mugabo cyangwa kubura umwanya wabo. Niba ingorane umugore agomba guhangana nyuma yo gutandukana nta gaciro afite kandi atsindwa cyane, kandi umubano wahindutse nabi, noneho birakwiye gutekereza gutandukana.

Nshobora kubabarira guhemukira umugabo we

Ntibisanzwe ko guha indi mahirwe umugabo we mugihe yari:

Guhora uhinduka;
Ntabwo atekereza kumibonano mpuzabitsina nundi mugore guhemukira;
yanze kumenya mu bikorwa ndetse, niba hari ibimenyetso;
Muri byose bishinja uwo mwashakanye.

Kurongora ibintu ni ibimenyetso byerekana ko umugabo atigera ahinduka. Yubaha umugore we, kandi ntabwo ari ingenzi kuri we kugirango abyashe ibinezeza bye.

Intambwe 7 zo Kubabarira

Inzira yo kubabarirwa ni ndende cyane kandi iragoye, ntutekereze rero ko uzashobora kwibagirwa ubuhemu bwumugabo mucyumweru. Niba rwose umugore ashaka gukomeza gushyingirwa, agomba kwiga kwifata n'ubwenge. Abahanga mu by'imitekerereze basaba guhera mu ntambwe zikurikira:

Kuvuga neza. Iyo amarangamutima atuje, agomba kuvugisha ukuri umugabo we, ariko atari hafi y'amabara meza, ahubwo aceceka kandi yubaka. Ni ngombwa kuguma mu biganza byawe, ntukatukeka kandi ntucire amakosa. Uhe uwo mwashakanye kugirango usobanure ibibajije ubuhemu. Igomba kandi gusobanuka nkuko abona umubano wawe, kandi witeguye gukora kugirango ubwiyunge. Mugihe cyo kuganira, witondere imyitwarire no kumenyekana kumugabo kugirango wumve uburyo inyangamugayo.
Imbabazi - Oya! Abagore bakunze kwishinja ko umugabo "yagiye ibumoso", ariko ibi ntibishobora gukorwa mubyo aribyo byose. Ni mukuru, kandi agomba kuba ashinzwe ibikorwa bye. Niba hari ikintu kitanyuzwe numubano, yagombaga kubiganiraho numugore we, akabishakira igisubizo, aho gusinzira nundi mugore. Gushinja, ntuzababarira uwo twashakanye, kandi ugumane na we umubabaro, ariko ntukagirire impuhwe, ariko ntukagirire urukundo.
Hindura. Kubabarirwa, umugabo we azakenera umwanya munini, kugirango ubudahwema kudatekereza guhemukira, birasabwa kwitondera ibindi bintu. Niba hari abana - bazabakikije kwitondera nurukundo, gerageza kumarana nabo umwanya munini. Niba nta mwana uhari, noneho ukinjire mubikorwa. Guhumeka buri munsi hamwe nakazi gahoraho bizafasha kurangaza ibitekerezo bibi. Ubundi buryo bwiza ni ibyo ukunda gushimisha.
Egoism nkeya ntabwo ibabaza. Ibyishimo byabagore, nko guhaha, gutembera muri salon yubwiza, gutembera muri cafe hamwe nabakobwa bakundana nibindi, bifasha rwose kwibagirwa ibibi. Bikunze kwiyambaza, kora ibyo nakoreshaga kugirango wange, kandi bidatinze mbona ko wibuka cyane, umwuka uhora ari mwiza, kandi wihesha agaciro wiyongereye cyane.
Ntukange ubufasha n'inkunga. Abagore benshi bahitamo kubona ubugambanyi wenyine. Bamwe ntibashaka kubababarira, abandi bizera ko bashobora guhangana mu bwigenge, naho ya gatatu bafite isoni ko byababayeho, no gutinya gucirwaho iteka. Abahanga mu by'imitekerereze ntibasabwa cyane kutarafunzwe, ahubwo basaba abantu bafasha. Vugana n'abizera, baza icyo azakora mu mwanya wawe. Kenshi na kenshi uzatora ikibazo - ububabare buke buzasa nkaho nawe.
Taba ku gutukwa no kwibutsa. Niba ushaka gukiza umuryango, nyuma yikiganiro cyeruye numugabo wanjye, ntunyibuke ko ari umunyaburiri kandi ntutuke igituntu. Tugomba kwihangana, kandi buri gihe mu bwifatanye bwamarangamutima twibutse ko ntamuntu ukingiwe amakosa, ikintu cyingenzi nuko abizi.
Gutandukana by'agateganyo. Komeza kubana numugabo wa mugenzi wawe ukigira ko ntakintu cyageragejwe kiragoye. Kugirango uburakari n'inzika bikonje gato, birakwiye kumara igihe. Nibyiza guhindura ibikoresho byumugore. Birasabwa kujya muri resitora cyangwa gusura bene wabo mubyumweru 1-2. Gutandukana by'agateganyo bizafasha ibitekerezo ndetse no kurambirwa na stuundrel yakundaga.

Nigute wababarira umugabo wibeshya - inama za psychologue

Iyo wize guhemukira, biragoye gukomeza gutumbagira, ariko aramutse ahisemo gukomeza umubano n'umugabo we, agomba kwiga kugenzura amarangamutima ye, kandi abone neza igisubizo cyiki kibazo. Kubungabunga umuryango, abahanga mu bya psychologue baratangazwa n'inama zikurikira:

Ntibikenewe ko uhagarika kandi ugategura inyenyeri, kuko igikomere cyo mu mwuka kizakira vuba, kandi umubano numugabo we urashobora guhindura bidasubirwaho. Ntabwo ari ngombwa kandi gutangira kumenya umubano nabanyamahanga, cyangwa kwinubira uwo mwashakanye nabi inshuti n'abavandimwe.
Birakenewe kubona uburyo bwo gukuraho amarangamutima mabi. Umuntu afasha siporo cyangwa umuziki, kandi umuntu ukubita amasahani. Ikintu nyamukuru nuko inzira yatoranijwe yo gukuraho uburakari ntacyo ikugirira nabi cyangwa ibindi.
Ntukifuze umugabo wawe kandi ntukifunge, kuko ibiganiro byukuri muburyo butatuje buzagirira akamaro gusa.
Ntukihorere hamwe nuwo twashakanye igiceri kimwe. Ibi bizaganisha kumpera yumubano. Byongeye kandi, umugore afite imitekerereze ya pschologique kugirango ahitemo ubuhemu, ariko niba bukozwe, bizakomeza kubabazwa no kwicuza.
Reba kenshi hamwe ninshuti kandi ukitabira ibirori byimyidagaduro, aho kumara umwanya wenyine.
Ntugerageze kumenya ikintu kijyanye numugore wahinduye umugabo wanjye. Ndetse birenze rero ntugomba kubibona cyangwa kuvugana.
Tangira kubika isi aho uzandika ibitekerezo byawe byose. Ubu buryo bufasha gukuraho uburakari n'inzika. Urashobora kandi kumwandikira umugabo wanjye ibaruwa, hanyuma uyitwike, ugereranya uburyo ibintu byose ari bibi.
Mugihe cyo guhangayika, birasabwa gukora umwuka mwinshi, kandi ukira buhoro kugeza icumi. Ubu buryo buzagufasha kuruhuka, kandi utekereze ku bikorwa byawe.

Nigute Wababarira Umugabo Wihebuho ukabaho?

Amaze kumenya ubuhemu bwumugabo we, imyifatire yerekeye impinduka. Hariho kutizerana no gushaka kubigenzura. Umugore atangira kwibaza amagambo ye nibikorwa bye. Ariko niba yarahisemo kubahiriza umuryango, agomba kongera kwiga umufatanyabikorwa wabo, ariko agomba no kugira uruhare rugaragara. Kwihutisha ibyago, abashakanye bakeneye gukora kugirango bateze imbere umubano, kandi ibi bikurikira bizafasha muribi:

Fata ibimenyetso byerekana ibitekerezo no gushima, kuko muri ubu buryo umugabo agerageza kwemeza icyaha cye, kandi yerekana ko uri umuhanda.
Ntugomba kuba igitambo, kandi uhora ukina ibintu, wibutsa uwo mwashakanye ku ikosa rye.
Witegereze nka mbere, ntugerageze kuganza ngo usuzugure umugabo wawe.
Tangira kumara umwanya hamwe kugirango usubize neza nurukundo mumibanire. Irashobora kuba ihuriro rireba firime, ubucuruzi bushimishije, guhaha cyangwa gutembera muri resitora.
Niba hari abana bahujwe, ugomba rero kumara umuryango wose igihe cyose gishoboka, bizafasha kukwibutsa ibyiyumvo no kubyo wahisemo kubabarira.

Birumvikana ko ubuhemu bw'uwo mwashakanye asiga urujijo ku mibanire, kandi yibagirwe ko bidashoboka. Ariko niba abafatanyabikorwa bifuza gukiza umuryango, kandi biteguye gukora ibi, bazashobora kurokoka aya makuba. Niba bidakora wigenga nikibazo, birasabwa kuvugana numu psychologue yumugabo uzafasha gushiraho umubano.

Ibisubizo

Urashobora kubabarira umugabo wanjye guhemukira, ariko bisaba igihe n'imbaraga nyinshi.
Rimwe na rimwe, ntugomba gutanga amahirwe ya kabiri kumugabo - nibyiza gutandukana.
Kugirango utsinde vuba, ntushobora kubika amarangamutima muri wewe no kwitwaza ko ntakintu cyabaye.