Wige impamvu abagore bakunda ibihuha no gusebanya cyane

Ahari ruzemera bidasanzwe, ariko abakobwa bose bazemeranya nanjye ko amazimwe ari igice cyingenzi mubuzima bwacu. Kandi hamwe na byose, ntacyo bitwaye, kuri com (cyangwa niki) dusebanya - kubyerekeye urugamba rushya - inshuti yabo yiyongera, cyangwa kubyerekeye umutware wabo, cyangwa kubyerekeye umunaniro, wongeye gutenguha , ariko inama idafite intego ...

Impamvu abagore bakunda ibihuha no gusebanya . Nzi neza ko abagabo benshi biteguye kugurisha ubugingo Sekibi, kugirango babone igisubizo cyikibazo. Reka tugerageze kubikora muriyi ngingo.

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Dukurikije inkoranyamagambo ya Ushakov, amazimwe Ninshuti cyangwa ihungabana ryo kumva umuntu wange ashingiye ku makuru adahwitse, atari yo.

Kandi inzira yo kwimura ubwayo ikozwe, kimwe no kwizerana, ifatwa nkiyera isoni.

Ariko ni iki mubyukuri bitera abantu gusebanya? Reka tumenye neza.

Nigute amazimwe n'ibihuha bivuka?

Nkunda aya makuru cyangwa ntabwo, ariko ukuri guhoraho - abagore bose basenga amazimwe. Kandi icyarimwe ntagira uruhare runini ku kigero cyabo, imibereho myiza, igihugu cyo gutura. Ibi bibaho kwisi yose kandi biracya kera.

Hanyuma, mugihe abantu bacu, bafite amategeko, bamara amasaha 24 kumunsi mumasomo atanga umusaruro rwose, turashobora gukunda cyane ikiganiro tukabitakaza umwanya munini. Kuki?

Abamuhugu ba psychologue bavuga ko hasi gukomera biyobewe nibibazo byubuzima bwisi kuruta igitsina cyiza. Abagabo bakomeza ku bitugu biremereye isi yose: bashishikajwe cyane na politiki, babangamira iherezo ryabantu bapfiriye muri Siriya, cyangwa abana basigaye imfubyi ...

Umutwe wacu wumugore wuzuza imirimo myinshi ya ProSaic: Ubuzima bwabana, ushobora guteka byihuse ifunguro ryiza, uburyo bwo kubona ururimi rusanzwe hamwe na nyirabukwe nibindi. Ntabwo duharanira agakiza k'isi, bivuze ko duhora dusanga umunota, undi kuganira kubintu runaka.

Amazimwe avuka kubera ubwihindurize?

Birashoboka kuvugana n'icyizere cyose kijyanye nuko inzira yo kwimura ibihuha kandi amazimwe ari icyitegererezo cyubwihindurize bwimyitwarire. Intego ya mbere ya gossip yarimo kwimura amakuru akenewe yafashaga abantu ba mbere kubaho. Biterwa no guhana amakuru ko ishingiro ryo guhuza imbaraga nogutezimbere intego za rusange. Niba tuvugana neza, noneho ibihuha kandi amazimwe ni igice cyingenzi mumico.

Amazimwe atangira kuvuka hamwe no kuza mumiryango minini. N'ubundi kandi, abandi bo mu muryango, benshi amahirwe yo kwinjira mu muntu mu kiganiro. Amazimwe yabonye imikorere yuruhererekanya, ikoreshwa ryayo yatanze amakuru yumuntu runaka cyangwa ibyabaye, ariko ntarambiranye kandi bishaje.

Hifashishijwe uburyo bunoze bwo kohereza amakuru mu itsinda rinini, igihe n'imbaraga n'imbaraga. Utekereza ko ari iki, ninde wundi wagize uruhare muriyi nzira yo kohereza amakuru? Birumvikana ko abari munsi yabandi ntibari mu buvumo bwabo.

Mu bagabo bari bafite imbaraga zikomeye z'umubiri harimo imirimo yabo - guhiga mammoth cyangwa ku ndangwe ya Saber-igoramye, ikuraho igihe n'imbaraga nyinshi. Ingufu kubibazo byubusa ntabwo byari bifite. Ariko abadamu b'umwimerere bamaranye igihe cyo kurambagizanya ku rubyaro no kubungabunga umuriro mu biganiro, mu biganiro n'abayobozi babo babonye imyidagaduro nyayo.

Ibihe kuva ibihe no kugeza uyu munsi ntibihinduka byinshi - abagabo baracyakora ibintu bikomeye, kandi abakobwa bafite umunezero mwinshi bahora biteguye kwiruka. Ariko kubwiyi ntego bakora?

Kuki dukeneye amazimwe muri iki gihe?

Birumvikana ko uyumunsi nta mpamvu yo gukwirakwiza amakuru kugirango abeho. Noneho kuki abagore benshi bakunda kuvanga, bigizwe nibihuha no gusebanya? Ndetse n'abakobwa b'inyangamugayo, bafite ubushishozi ndetse na bakomeye rimwe na rimwe ntibabura amahirwe yo gusimbura amagufwa.

Abaterankunga bashimishijwe n'iki kibazo maze bahitamo kumenya impamvu abakobwa n'abagore batanze kugira ngo baganire ku bandi bantu. Ibisubizo byabo bizakugirira akamaro:

Hifashishijwe ababoshye, abagore bakira ubumwe nibidukikije. Wibuke - iyo ubwira umuntu ibanga ryawe ryibanga, uhita ugaragaza ko umuntu wizeye. Noneho, mugihe urimo gusebanya, washyizeho umubonano, ishingiro ryikizere.
Ikwirakwizwa rya Amazimwe n'ibihuha bifasha kugenda! Hano nanone hakurikiramo ihame ryo kwizerana, kubera ko ari ukuri gushiramo guhura kuruta kumenyana. Umwe usanzwe asanzwe mu mibonano mpuzabitsina, amazimwe n'ibihuha bifasha gushyigikira ikiganiro iyo ingingo zishimishije zirangira kandi habaho guhagarara nabi bibaho.
Byongeye kandi, abantu bagoretse hamwe namagufa kugirango bagabanye urwego rwimpanuka. Kuganira ubusa akenshi biruhukira nk'ikirahure cya vino nziza. Ibi bisa nishyaka ryabagabo kumikino ya videwo.

Ubwonko bwumuntu bwakozwe kuburyo mugihe atakira amakuru meza cyane kubandi, tubona ibyiyumvo byumuco, tugereranya ubuzima bwacu nubuzima bwabandi. Birumvikana ko bidasobanura ko abantu bishimira undi muraba, "nta buryo, twumva gusa umunezero, niba tubona ko ibintu byose mubuzima bwacu bikomeza mubihe byabandi bantu.

Amazimwe ni peculiar "yabujijwe." Twese tuzi neza ko urugwiro rudakora rwose ntacyo cyiza, cyane niba tuvugana numuntu mubi. Ariko nubwo nubwo bimeze bityo, twiha umwanya kandi dutsinzwe nibinezeza bibujijwe. Ninkaho, kwicara ku ndyo, uhita uhitamo gukanda igice cya keke iryoshye. Birumvikana ko uje kumva wicira urubanza gake, ariko iyi myumvire izatontoma kubera imitsi.
Ariko hariho amazimwe nibintu byiza - bityo, bigira uruhare mu "gutunganya" ibintu bitandukanye, bituma abantu bakabona uburambe bushya. Abakobwa bose (kandi rimwe na rimwe ntabwo ari abakobwa gusa) bumva ko ari ngombwa kubwira undi muntu ikintu cyingenzi kuri bo ubwabo. Kandi intego yibi ni ugusesengura no kubona isuzuma ryibisubizo byundi muntu.
Kandi, hamwe nubufasha bwabo, basesengura umubano wabo nabandi. Hanyuma, nk'abahagarariye imibonano mpuzabitsina ikomeye, muburyo bwose, uko byagenda kose, ni izihe abandi bantu babigaragariza, abadamu barumiwe, abadamu barumiwe ni iki kibazo. Kandi ukoresheje amazimwe, bahabwa amakuru ntarengwa yerekeye isano yabantu hagati yabo.
Indi mpamvu yo gusebanya nimbaraga zibyiyumvo byabo nubunararibonye. Ibintu birakenewe cyane mugihe abakobwa batangiye gushaka, baguma mu mitekerereze idahwitse yo mu mutwe. Ni ukuvuga, mugihe ubwenge bwabo bwemeranijwe nikintu. Ntabwo abanga ko twese turi abakobwa, ni ibiremwa byamarangamutima cyane kandi bihana amarangamutima kuri twe ari ngombwa.
Ndashimira amazimwe, tubwirana amabanga yacu. Umugabo ntashobora gutera icyizere amakuru akurikira, ariko abakobwa bashoboye umubano winshuti utaryarya, ariko, munsi yubuzima bumwe - inshuti yuzuye yizeye inshuti. Hanyuma bariteguye kubwirana na rimwe "amabanga" ateye ubwoba ". Ariko abahagarariye hasi bakomeye ntibashobora kwizera byimazeyo inshuti zabo. Nuzuye, kuko zigumaho nta soko nziza yamakuru.

Abahanga bamenye impamvu abagore basenga amazimwe!

N'abagore bato bato, kandi abantu benshi bakuze banze imigatirekeye abanywanyi bashoboka mugikorwa cyo guhangana no kwitabwaho. Umwanzuro nk'uwo wakozwe na psychologute y'Abanyamerika nyuma yo kwiga bireba. Hamwe nibisubizo byayo, urashobora gusanga mu kinyamakuru "Ikinyamakuru cya psychologiya myschologiya".

Nk'uko ubushakashatsi bwakozwe mbere, imico ijana na mirongo itatu n'irindwi itandukanye y'isi, yasanze guhangana hagati y'abagore kubera imibanire y'urukundo n'abagabo bibaho mu mirongo cyenda n'ijanisha rimwe.

Umwanditsi mukuru wubu bushakashatsi ni Tanya Reynolds. Yerekana umwanya wacyo kuri ibi:

"Kubera ko igihe cya kera cyabaye, ku buryo umuryango uzaba, umufasha w'umugore. Muri iki gihe, ibi ntibikiri ngombwa, kubera ko abagore bafunguye amahirwe yo guhabwa uburezi n'imirimo. Ariko iyo imwe mu masoko yinjiza umuryango yatakaye, hariho kugabanuka kumubare wibintu bikenewe kugirango ugishe urubyaro.

Kandi inzira yo gushyingirwa ni ibintu bitesha umutwe. Kubwibyo, ni ngombwa cyane gufata umufatanyabikorwa mubuzima bwumuzamu wurugo rwibanda kumuryango murugo hamwe numuryango wacyo.

Byongeye kandi, ntabwo ibura akamaro kayo n'icyubahiro cy'abakobwa n'abagore, kuko biterwa ahanini, bizashobora gukora umubano mwiza, kora ubucuti cyangwa kugera ku ntsinzi mu mwuga.

Dukurikije ubushakashatsi, byagaragaye ko ubwo bworora bwo gusebanya bugira ingaruka cyane kuburyo umugore afatwa muri societe. Twebwe, nk'ubutegetsi, dushishikajwe no gushimangira amakuru mabi ku muntu runaka, kuko bizavuga byinshi kuri kamere muntu kuruta uko umuntu akumva ibintu byiza byinshi kuri we. "

Reynolds yagize amasomo 5, ashingiye ku bisubizo byagaragaye ko amashyaka y'abakobwa bakiri bato, kimwe n'abadamu bakuze mu bihe bikuze, bafite impengamiro yo gutandukanya amazimwe ku "moko".

Byongeye kandi, birashimishije kubona amakuru aminjagiye azagabanywa cyane niba umuntu yaganiriweho ari ukwishimira hanze, imyenda igateganyo cyangwa gukundana na mugenzi wabo.

Inyigisho ya mbere yari igizwe n'abitabiriye ijana cumi n'umwe - abagabo mirongo ine n'umunani na mirongo itandatu na batatu mu cyiciro kuva ku myaka 19 kugeza 65. Bose bagaragaje ifoto yabadamu bahuza ifishi ishimishije, yitwaga Francesca. Akanatanga kwiyumvisha, nkaho agaragara mubidukikije. Inshingano ya wize kwari ukuzamura igipimo kiri hagati Ishusho Yumuco wa FARNI, imigambi yabo yo guhambirana na we, gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina, jya umunsi cyangwa guhamagara (Abagore barashobora kugereranya bidasanzwe amanota abiri).

Noneho bagombaga gushimira imigambi yabo, ariko hashingiwe ku "bintu" icumi ku byerekeye umuntu wize. Ibintu byagize ingaruka kubiranga Ubufaransa nubuzima bwe. Nk'uko icyiciro cya mbere cy'ibirego, Francesca yasobanuwe nk Umuntu udafite akazi, yashishikajwe no kwinjira mu mibonano mpuzabitsina idahwitse, ahindura umukunzi we afite umubyibuho ukabije kandi yibwira ko atwite.

Nibindi bintu bisigaye byaganiriye ku kuba we Yishora mu rukundo, azi indimi 4, ikunda gutembera kandi ifite amakuru meza yijwi.

Ku bahanga, nta gitangaje ku buryo ubwo bwoko bw'amagambo yaranzwe n'ubufaransa bwatangiyega cyane kumwihaza abantu, mu buryo nk'ubwo ku bijyanye no gutwita.
Muri icyo gihe, kubaho k'uburemere birenze ntabwo byari bifite uruhare runini ku mibonano mpuzabitsina ikomeye kandi yongeyeho impuhwe nyinshi mu gice cy'intege nke. Ibishoboka byo gutwita nabyo byafashaga ingingo yo kubona aho abagore baho.
Birashimishije kubona ko icyifuzo cyo gutangira umubano winshuti n'Ubufaransa, kuzenguruka isi, abagabo bashyizwe mu manota 5.58 (yabaye ikimenyetso cyerekana ibintu byose byose). Ariko icyifuzo cyo kwita ku mibonano mpuzabitsina cyahawe amanota 3.85.
Icyifuzo cyo kumwita, niba gishobora kuba gitwite, cyasuzumwe n'abagabo mu manota 2.17. Ariko niba atari indatwi icyarimwe, kandi barwaye indwara zuzuye cyangwa kera byari ubuhemu, abagabo ntibari amanota 1.5.
Kubaho ubuzima bwimbitse ntabwo byagize ingaruka nabi cyane ku cyifuzo cy'abantu gutangiza ubucuti n'Ubufaransa - kuri iki kintu bashira amanota ane.
Ibishoboka byo gushyingirwa byafashije ikizamini cyo kwikizamini cyikizamini cyubwenge - ingingo enye. Yayoboye no ku nkingi yerekeye icyifuzo cyo gutangirana numubano wumufana.
Gukora hamwe nabagabo byimibonano mpuzabitsina bashakaga cyane na verisiyo yize, ifite indimi enye.
Naho igice gikomeye, hano francesca yashyize ingingo zisumba izindi, niba yari umugenzi, yishora mu rukundo kandi akagira ubwenge bwinshi. Kubera iyo mpamvu, ubuzima budasanzwe bwongerewe urwango rukomeye ku bagore, kuba hari Patologiya ya Venereal no guhemukira kera.

Umukobwa woroshye ushobora kuboneka atera antipati mubandi bagore

Abahanga mu bya siyansi batekereje ko mu rubanza hari irushanwa ry'umubano hamwe n'umuhanga mu mibonano mpuzabitsina ikomeye, ugomba kwiyongera niba umubano umaze kubaho, ariko mu buryo butunguranye uwo muhanganye agaragara.

Kandi bahisemo gukora irindi bushakashatsi bafite uruhare rw'abagore magana abiri n'abagore cumi na bane. Bagaragajwe nifoto yumukobwa ukomoka mu bushakashatsi bwa mbere (ariko ubu bwari bumaze kuvugwa na Veronica) maze abaza 50% by'iperereza kugira ngo akore iperereza kugira ngo akore ko yari Gukundana nabafatanyabikorwa babo.

Nyuma yibyo, abitabiriye amahugurwa bamenyereye urutonde rwibice byambere byubushakashatsi bagasaba igipimo kimwe kugirango basuzume kubintu runaka bazemera Ubushishozi kuri Veronica ibirego bitandukanye.

Birumvikana ko abo badamu bafite amashyirahamwe bazababara kubera gukundana ku makosa ya Veronica, byerekanaga ko akwirakwiza amakuru ashyira mu gaciro amureba ndetse n'ababuranyi bagaragara.

Hanyuma, abahanga mu bushake batangaga rwose abitabiriye amahugurwa kimwe ifoto yiburyo bwibitsina bibiri byigitsina gore, icyambere muricyo cyakiriye ikigereranyo cyo hejuru mumiterere yabagabo kuruta iya kabiri. Abitabiriye amahugurwa basabye ko umukobwa wo mu ifoto yahise yisanga mu bidukikije, kandi bari bakeneye kuzamura isuzuma uko biteguye gusebanya, bazi amakuru y'ubushakashatsi bwabanje.

Banyarwandakazi bafite ishyaka ryinshi Twakuriye kubyerekeye umunywanyi ushimishije ducecetse kubiranga byiza. Ku buryo abagore bashakaga kugirira nabi ubwiza, bagize ingaruka kandi bahura no guhangana.

Abashakashatsi bageze ku bisubizo bimwe, kandi bagayobora intambwe zikurikira z'ubushakashatsi, zitanga isuzuma ry'imfura zangiza izina ry'amoko yabo, rishingiye ku buryo izaba nziza. Ibyiza umukobwa yarebye ku ifoto cyangwa imyenda yimibonano mpuzabitsina yari yizeye, ibyago bikomeye ibyago byiyongereye kuva amazimwe.

Icyiciro cyanyuma cyubushakashatsi cyarimo abanyeshuri ijana bane mugihe cyimyaka cumi n'umunani kugeza mirongo itatu. Bose bagombaga kuza muri laboratoire, aho basanze bari kumwe n'abitabiriye amahugurwa babiri bitondewe, uwambere yari afite umusaruro uharanira inyungu, naho uwa kabiri yari yambaye neza. Abitabiriye amahugurwa bari bafite icyizere ko intego y'ubushakashatsi yagombaga kumva imirimo y'abantu mu matsinda.

Muburyo bwo kugerageza, umushakashatsi wumugabo yatumiye abakobwa batatu kandi abaha imirimo ya logique. Noneho abitabiriye amashuri ya mbere bagombaga kujya mu kindi cyumba, umushakashatsi aragenda kandi, na Fransca (cyangwa Veronica), mu mabanga yabwiye mugenzi we, maze mu mabanga yabwiye gato kandi aryamana n'abantu babiri.

Guhera nyuma yibyo, umushakashatsi yagarukaga avuga ko Ubufaransa bwashoje inshingano. Noneho abitabiriye ba mbere bakurikiwe nibikorwa hamwe nishyaka rya kabiri. Iheruka nkaho injwi zabazaga uko akazi kakozwe numukobwa wabanjirije. Amaherezo, umushakashatsi yasabye ibibazo by'abagize uruhare ku bijyanye no gukorana na mugenzi wanjye wa mbere n'uwa kabiri.

Kandi mugihe cyizewe gusa twize, ibyo ari byo byose ishingiro ryibigeragezo. Ukurikije ibisubizo bye, byaragaragaye:

Abakobwa barumiwe kubushake bwerekeye umunyamuryango wambaye imibonano mpuzabitsina;
Niba kandi francesca yabonetse mu myambarire ya conservaternative, abitabiriye amahugurwa ntibabwiwe bashishikaye kubijyanye n'imiterere ye ibirungo.

Reynolds yahuye nabyo ko abagore badafite icyifuzo cyo gutsinda Birashoboka cyane, babigerika kurwego rwubwenge mugihe hagaragaye iterabwoba rishoboka bivuka kumubano wabo.

No mu bushakashatsi bwa mbere, basanze ko abanyamwuga beza b'abakobwa birashoboka cyane mu ruhare rw'abazize amazimwe kurusha abagabo beza.

Ati: "Ukurikije amakuru yabonetse, ni ibintu bifatika gutekereza ko ari abahagarariye uburinganire budakomeye ko abatatana. Mu bihe biri imbere, bakunze gusezerera isohoka ry'amakuru mu ikipe ikora, "Ubushakashatsi bwemera.

Byongeye kandi, Reynolds yemera ko imyanzuro yubushakashatsi bwayo izabasha kongera urwego rwo kumenya abadamu, rugomba kugira ingaruka nziza hagati yabo kandi igenewe kongera gutekereza cyane kugirango babone umuntu amazimwe.

Imyanzuro ya nyuma ku ngingo

Amazimwe afite inkuru ndende cyane kandi kurwego runaka mubikorwa byubwihindurize niterambere rya societe.
Abahagarariye uburinganire bukomeye ntibakunda gutandukana nabitewe nuko babangamiye ibibazo bikomeye byingenzi.
Amazimwe aragufasha gushiraho umubano wizeye hagati yabashaka, wongeyeho murwego runaka rutanga umusanzu mugukuraho imihangayiko.
Dukurikije ibyavuye mu bushakashatsi bw'abahanga, abagore bashishikajwe no gukwirakwiza amazimwe ku nzogera z'amoko ishimishije, cyangwa niba bumva akaga kabo.

Iyo ingingo ishimishije, ndagusaba kureba nta videwo ishimishije. Amashusho: